"mind over body, body over soul"

Monday, February 28, 2005

we are diff pple.

we lead diff lifes.

so pls.

dun bother me.

i dun wanna be recognised kay.

i dun lyk attention.

n if u haf something 2 say abt me.

go ahead.

i dun gif a fuck.

i dun wanna change fer ne1 walking on the street.

i oni do it 4 loved ones.

yeah.

i love you perfectionist.

-shamita
7:22 PM

to certain snrs out dere.

does it hurt u if i wear a skirt?

does it?

i dont bother u, u dun bother me.

ok?

haiz.

UNWANTED ATTENTION.

HEHS.

-shamita
6:56 PM

why?

-shamita
2:26 PM

HBWBSQXTSBWFDEROFHJGVGBFRG.

WTF?!

-shamita
10:33 AM

Saturday, February 26, 2005

I THINK.

WHATEVER I TOLD HER HAS NEVER MATTERED.

I THINK.

SHE TOOK IT AS CRAP.

WHEN EVERYTHING WAS REALLY TRUE.

I JUST HATE THIS SCREWED LIFE.

IM ONLY ASKING FOR A HAPPY LIFE WITH HER.

JUST ME N HER.

AND GUESS WHAT.

I WONT GET IT.

HEHS.

-shamita
10:46 PM

Thursday, February 24, 2005

it was my best friend.

it was my everything.

it understood wat no one could.

it has always been dere 4 me.

now..

its gone.

it was also meant 4 her..

and i nid it so badly now.

2dae was terrible.

bad day.

lessons were ok larh.

hmt den got some prob..

started missing her.

n ashwani juz made things worse larh.

coz of wat she did, i wanted 2 do it too.

i really wanted to do it i tell u.

did maths to 4get abt my lost thing.

was wif jolene 2dae.

i did haf a gd time at the umbrella place.

jnrs so funny pls.

dey tot nobdy was inside the umbrella n started spinning it.

me n jo were inside lorh.

hard 2 explain larh.

went mobil wif her.

u noe da lady didnt wear her zip.

i laugh so much.

n phua gave me n jo dis sissy smile.

we laugh so much larh.

tok 2 her pic alot 2dae..

if oni she could hear wat i was saying..

haizz..

i dnoe wat t do now..

so sad..

i juz want her by my side..

it'll neva happen tho..

lately, im not who i used to be.

-shamita
8:13 PM

Wednesday, February 23, 2005

so sad oreadi..

no hug..

tskk..

i dnoe wat 2 say..

n tell me.

when will i be seeing her again after fri?

)':

-shamita
8:13 PM

juz came back frm sci..

we start on a "interesting" chpt 2dae.

hoho.

so farnie canx?

mrs neo make us pronounce "penis" 6times.

n we cannot laugh lorh.

my face was so pink trying not t laugh.

some things are so disgusting pls.

lyk the.. er.. cervix widening during birth.

yucks.

den khathija said "fertilisation occurs when the 2 sex cells fuse"

den i ask her, "how do dey fuse arh?"

aiya.

it was juz so hilarious pls.

oh.

n my fren ask me, "is the penis found in females?"

hahah.

anw. fridae i got something very impt on lehx.

n o lvl results coming out on dat day arh?

cannot pon da lesson or da teacher will scold..

how now?

TSKK.

haiz..

shall go slp now..

didnt slp well ystrdae..

toodles!

-shamita
9:19 AM

Monday, February 21, 2005

i wanna be by ur side,

every day,

every hour,

every minute,

no matter where u are,

and what ur going thru.

iloveyou.

having difficulty studying?

i dnoe..

pls shamita..

go study go..

u can play 2moro..

n tink abt it.

she mite say ur a gd gurl..

if u pass maths..

y r u rotting here?

concentrate..

put her at the back of ur mind 4 a while..

A WHILE.

bah.

oh no.

why am i toking to myself?

-shamita
8:30 PM

When you are together with that special someone,
you pretend to ignore that person.
Bu twhen thatspecial someone is not around,
you might look around to find them.
At that moment, you are in love.
Although there is someone else who always makes you laugh,
your eyes and attention might go only to that special someone.
Then, you are in love.
Although that special someone was supposed to have called you long back,
to let you know of their safe arrival, your phone is quiet.
You are desperately waiting for the call!
At that moment, you are in love.
If you are much more excited for oneshort e-mail from that special someone than other many long e-mails,
you are in love.
When you find yourself as one who cannot erase all the messages in your answering machine because of one message from that specialsomeone,
you are in love.
When you get a couple of free movietickets,
you would not hesitate to think of that special someone.
Then,you are in love.
You keep telling yourself, "that special someoneis just a friend",
but you realize that you cannot avoid that person's special attraction.
At that moment, you are in love.
While you are reading this page,
if someoneappears in your mind,
then u are in love with that person.
so sweet rite?
taken from friendster bulletin.

-shamita
7:33 PM

Sunday, February 20, 2005

if you believe in me,

if you believe in my love,

and if you believe that its true,

u'll noe why i cant let go.

iloveyou.

-shamita
5:23 PM

Saturday, February 19, 2005

hoho.

juz reached home.

did some stuff..

eh i oni got 9bucks left now.

i went 2 sa wif almost 40bucks.

hehs.

was looking 4 her after reaching sa.

den my sharp eye spotted her after so long canx?

shes so nice.

iloveher.

den bot her balloon.

dinie gave it 2 her larh.

was kinda scared.

finally i gave her something.

instead of piling up evrything in my drawer.

FINALLY.

the balloons so nice can?

i want 20balloons 4 my burfdae.

possible?

n a rose.

hoho.

was juz looking at her larh..

den was da most fun part.

shh!

i dun wanna get a slap.

lyk what dinie said.

hehs.

den i dnoe wat happen 2 me can.

i ran up 2 her.

seriously, it wasnt me at all.

i cant even rmb wat i said 2 her.

i wanna hug her n hold her hand..

how to ask arh..

haiz..

den she ask me 2 go study 4 cmmn test!

i shall study extra.

hahah.

den left sa..

din get 2 c sistar..

-sobs

went shopping after dat.

bot chain dat says ilovez-----.

11bucks lorh.

den bot some other stuff..

dere was dis so cute soft toy wif ilu..

SO UBER CUTE.

40bucks eh..

i wanna buy 4 her ok.

anw.

nows not da time 2 be hapi abt toking 2 her.

COMMON TEST SHAMITA.

if i do well, she must say im a gd gurl kay.

shall go study now..

toodles!

coz u dont truly love me.

-shamita
3:42 PM

Thursday, February 17, 2005

whee..
i did well fer my other tests!
hoho.
im being a gd gurl. (:
i pay attention, do all my hw, etcetc.
HAHAH.
astonishing.
n im less tired nowadays can?
my mum was rite afterall i guess.
finally im doing well in studies.
hee. (:
miss my perfectionist.
i'll tok 2 her after cmmn test.
im afraid i'll get hurt if i tok 2 her.
den cant do well 4 cmmn test.
miss my sistar too.
so long since we msg each other rite?
hehs.
oh.
i love my dahling dinie so much can?
in a snr-jnr way larh.
MY DAHLING DINIE. (:
hehe.
mdm yap is so proud dat im doing EXTRA math practises.
n scolded shamini 4 laughing at me while i was studying.
HEH.
shamini is my FLUFFY BUNNY! (:
MY DAHLING FLUFFY BUNNY.(:
got 2 noe a jnr.
shes cool.
hehs.
im a happy gurl. (:
you cant hide it frm urself shamita.
she doesnt love u.
n ur not happy abt it, are u?
goon's explanation.
a rattling car engine can move a distance.
but soon, it'll stop.
i hope i keep moving.

-shamita
12:02 PM

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

cmmn tests coming!!

so scared canx?

n dat stoopid jolene.

almost made me pon lit mass lecture.

but im so good rite.

i brought her back up.

den suddenly my friends woke me up.

i slept.

TSKK.

during eng also i slept.

ms low didnt come.

n i had t suddenly wake up again.

my hair all messed up.

siow came in.

he show us a poem abt unrequited love.

haizz..

so sad canx?

anw.

i got tons of undone HMT hw.

haiz.

HMT sucks.

shall do it.

n study fer sci.

did i mention?

I HATE MY PARENTS.

dey work n work n come back at nite.

den dey will start nagging.

n my mother.

so terrible canx?

always get me scolded.

i shant be angry wif dem.

not after linda goon's explanation.

IM STILL ANGRY LARH.

i tink i better go study now..

I LOVE HER.

but she doesnt.

silent cries for help.

-shamita
8:40 PM

Monday, February 14, 2005

i wanna be ur shadow..

i hate this pointless life.

-shamita
10:04 PM

I LOVE HER SO MUCH.

HAPPY V DAY EVERYONE.

-shamita
8:41 PM

Sunday, February 13, 2005

shamita stop lying!

-shamita
8:08 PM

if only she comes 2moro..

mebbe i shud juz wait.

lying to myself.

i noe i still love her.

-shamita
5:30 PM

Saturday, February 12, 2005

shamita doesnt noe whats happening to her.

save her from herself.

-shamita
9:03 PM

i dnoe why i said dat to her.

i`ll juz continue larh.

woke up 2dae wif fever.

39.2 degrees.

went clinic.

da doctor gave me multivitamin syrup.

n medicines larh.

she said im weak.

whatever.

den did some maths.

n science.

im bored..

i dnoe wat im trying to do..

why did i do it..

i promised myself not t do it..

n juz dat one moment,

when i said i didnt love her,

i suddenly did it..

tskk..

was all tears after dat..

im supposed t be happy btw.

so there.

im a HAPPY GURL.

((:

-shamita
3:03 PM

Friday, February 11, 2005

why?

-shamita
9:01 PM

i love my perfectionist.

-shamita
12:07 PM

i love my perfectionist.

-shamita
12:07 PM

i love my perfectionist.

-shamita
12:07 PM

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

i wanna talk to her.

tell her i didnt wanna run.

tell her im hurt.

etcetc.

n dats wat d**** tinks i shd do too.

but i cant.

i juz cannot..

been doing maths the whole day.

got distracted soo many times..

haizz..

i juz love her so much..

n i cant let go..

no matter wat she tinks..

its really hard on me.

oh wells.

i'll put on a mask.

for evryones happiness.

friends, seniors, parents, teachers, sistar..

sighs..

-shamita
2:19 PM

Tuesday, February 08, 2005

i juz hate life.

and joyene.

-shamita
7:16 PM

i never wanted things to go dis way.

thats the truth.

-shamita
4:31 PM

Monday, February 07, 2005

cross country.

was ok larh..

i was walking.

heh.

peihan came.

lols.

had 2 c linda goon after dat.

shes so nice!!

-smiles

she praise me too much.

n mess up my hair soo many times.

she put her hand on my shoulder n walk.

pls dun tell me i was blushing..

she gave me tidbits!

har!

hafta c her 2moro also..

(((:

ms goon rawks.

my swensens icecream is gone..

i lyk it so much canx..

eh YOU.

dun u dare gimme valentine day presents arh.

or u'll see another big msg on ur whiteboard.

i dun wanna be mean..

but i really love her..

n i cant let u lyk me..

coz we will never be.

im missing her..

haizz..

i dun wanna hear her say it again..

"i lead a different life now"

-sobs

i'll take ur darkest night and make it bright for you.

-shamita
7:48 PM

Sunday, February 06, 2005

im moodswinging.

tskk.

dnoe why..

im so pissed wif my mom.

ive been begging her cont. 4 3days..

to not take me out of np..

i even cried lorh.

n she tell me, "stop acting"

den, "go to hell"

lyk wth fuck can.

wasnt happy at all ystrdae..

i want her t be happy larh..

not happy 2dae also..

im still begging my mom..

n she doesnt sound happy..

n i feel lyk crying larh..

dnoe why..

but i dun wanna cry..

i got hyperactive tear glands arh.

my maths is lyk. -.-

i dnoe how 2 do the hw..

haizz..

i hate this..

i really do.

it keeps running thru my head;

im not worth your love.

*dinie, take note of the above.

-shamita
1:53 PM

Friday, February 04, 2005

IM SO DAMN ANGRY WITH YOU.

PLS ASK YOURSELF AGAIN.

WHO IS SELF-CENTERED?

WTH FUCK.

IM GONNA KILL YOU.

STOP LYING.

STOP CHEATING ON PPLE.

JUZ STOP EVRYTHING UR DOING.

ITS ALL WRONG.

-shamita
8:57 PM

did i mention?

"truth is" reminds me of her..

it makes me feel lyk i still love her.

im gonna switch off da damn radio.

tskk.

-shamita
7:30 PM

i love my sistar!

hehe.

ok so.

was rushing in da morning.

went t c linda goon.

u noe wat.

shes nice larh.

hahah.

nice toking 2 her.

had geog test.

was ok i suppose?

den had sci test.

no comments.

had story telling course.

u idiot khathija!

she keep laughing.

during the relexation thingy.

so irritating!

see larh.

my imagination didnt feel real!

hmph!

sneaked out t c francesca.

i love her!

hahah.

i lyk hugging her!

my one and only sistar!

shes so cute in da pic canx?

heh.

i juz dun geddit gurl.

one moment u say ur gonna kill urself.

n i get so worried n tensed up.

but u look so hapi.

u ARE hapi.

i cannot belief it.

ashwani called t tell me abt DAT.

tskk.

ahh!

my fave song!

shut up by simple plan.

i love da dj.

heh.

ohh.

im neva gonna run away frm her.

now i noe how irritating it is.

my jnr ran frm 1st floor to 4th floor.

n hid behind the door.

den she c me.

she ran down w/o looking back.

wth hell is dat supposed 2 mean?

she dares to call me "honey".

even after i told her so many times dat i luv her.

tskk.

i dun want juz ANYONE to hold.

yeap.

reminds me.

i love [her]!

hee. (:

-shamita
7:11 PM

Thursday, February 03, 2005

tskk.

sch so boring..

im sleepy 2dae larh..

hafta c linda AGAIN lorh.

shes lyk..

should i say counseling me?

n all i do is nod my head.

i dun make things up.

why should i?

i DO NOT love you.

n u noe who i love.

so stop lying to ashwini.

-shamita
11:37 AM

pls gimme another chance..

coz i dun tink im gonna njoy being in library club.

ewwww.

pls mommy..

i'll study..

-shamita
9:53 AM

Wednesday, February 02, 2005

hee.

im ultra happy now!

she said im a good gurl!!

im smiling so much.

even tho i got 2 marks 4 my math test.

hahahah.

i love her.

-shamita
7:47 PM

hold my hand and bring me away-

please..

-shamita
1:57 PM

haiz..

my heart aches..

mebbe i shouldnt listen 2 "everybody" dis time.

i'll ask her.

but if she did come...

den i noe wat i'll do.

i slept ystrday lyk i was neva gonna wake up kay.

in the end, the alarm woke me up.

hmph.

im really pissed wif her larh..

i dun ever wanna tok 2 her again..

i wont sms her nemore..

blahblahblah.

its juz not worth it.

n also.

she said "stop mixing wif these kinda pple"

hahah.

ohh.

i cannot believe i did well fer hmt test.

n the teacher ask if i study hard.

the whole class started laughing i tell u.

lol.

oh btw.

yuani really rawks kay..

i told her abt dat idiot denise.

not allowing me to fold my socks even abit.

n she said, "ask her t shut up larh"

so cool canx..

if only i had da courage..

im paying attention in class eh..

tskk..

gotta go soon liaos..

I MISS [HER] LOADS.

-shamita
9:40 AM

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

its all my fault..
y din i study frm the beginning?
den i could haf gone fer np..
den i wouldnt be grounded..
den i could have seen her..
im gonna kill myself larh.
to you:
u say im self-centered.
ive always been dere 4 u..
when u came crying 2 me..
when u said u had probs..
ive always been dere..
n do u noe i cried?
when u were down?
it hurts me alot k.
n when i needed u juz now..
when i broke down during assembly..
u ignored me when i called u..
heh.
im self-centered huh.

-shamita
8:27 AM